# To God -- From, The Dog



## LoudRam (May 23, 2010)

I don't know if this has been posted yet but i thought it was funny. Especially #12

To God -- From, The Dog 
Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?

Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the " Chrysler Beagle"?

Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?

Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember - to be a good dog.

1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.

3. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.. neither are laps.

4. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

5. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

6. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and registration.

7. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet

8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.

9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.

10. I will not throw up in the car.

11. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.


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## Pixiesmom (Jul 31, 2008)

Thanks for the laugh!
Pixie must remember #4 and Mig #5.


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## Scooter's Family (May 23, 2008)

#3 is a continuing problem in our house!


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## Luciledodd (Sep 5, 2009)

No 12 is an all day affair at our house.


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## KSC (Aug 6, 2009)

OMG I died laughing at #11 - Kipling has been known to do this...


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## Lilly'sMom (Jan 28, 2010)

That is great! #3 definitely, followed by #12, only with Lilly not being the sqeaky toy.


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## pjewel (Apr 11, 2007)

first good laugh of the day. Loved it.


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## Miss Paige (Apr 4, 2008)

We voted here-and think that # 2 only it should be dead anything-worms leading our fav thing then bird poo, # 3-and that includes all the chairs-# 4 but that also has to include anyone walking up or down the street-the dog two blocks away-the dog three blocks away and everyone on all sides of the house-# 9 if you can even get the "girls to go out in the rain-since they are sugar (so they think) and will melt just as fast as the Wicked Witch of the West did-# 11 for all three.

Miss Paige, Mr Roman, Ms Frannie

And thanks for a great laugh to end my crazy week.

Pat (humom to)
Miss Paige
Mr Roman
Ms Frannie


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## PattyNJ (Sep 19, 2007)

Awwww...that was so cute!

Anyone remember the old Jimmy Stewart poem about his dog Beau?


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## pjewel (Apr 11, 2007)

That was wonderful! Brought tears to my eyes . . . and everyone else's, it would appear.


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## Kathie (Jul 31, 2008)

Sure brought tears to my eyes, too! That was so sweet!


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## SMARTY (Apr 19, 2007)

A laugh, then a cry..............


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