# New diet



## SMARTY (Apr 19, 2007)

I received this from a friend:

Yesterday I was at my local WALMART buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog, and was in the checkout line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had, an elephant?

So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. 
I added that I probably shouldn't,
because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. 

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. 
(I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) 

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive
care because the dog food poisoned me. I
told her no, I stepped off a curb
to sniff an Irish Setter's ass and a car hit us both. 

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. 

WALMART won't let me shop there anymore.

Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.


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## marjrc (Jan 13, 2007)

LMAO !! Now why is it that I think this is something Dana would do?? LOL


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## Luciledodd (Sep 5, 2009)

I love it. That is something I would do if my old brain would think of it anymore.


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## mellowbo (Aug 12, 2007)

Sandi, that is so funny. Marj, I'm gonna tell Dana on you!
Carole


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## juliav (Nov 21, 2006)

Sandi,

You are hysterical!!!!


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## Scooter's Family (May 23, 2008)

ound:


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## HavaneseSoon (Nov 4, 2008)

You didn't! That story was so funny! 

I would of loved to see the reaction on that person's face! How old were they?


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## Poornima (Jun 29, 2007)

Hilarious! ound:


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## gelbergirl (Jun 9, 2007)

Sandi , naughty naughty! that is so funny


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## psvzum (Jun 11, 2009)

OMG!!!! I LOVE it!!!
That is the funniest thing I've heard in a long time!
ound:


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## Lunastar (Feb 9, 2009)

ROFL


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## whitBmom (Nov 27, 2006)

That is just too funny!!! You are a riot and I can only imagine the mortified look on the woman's face LOL But then again, she WAS asking the obvious question... LOL


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## Carefulove (Mar 20, 2009)

LMAO


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## LuckyOne (Sep 3, 2009)

ROFLMAO!


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