# Need your thoughts



## Cherin36 (Sep 2, 2010)

My sister and her family met Chewy and fell in love. They have been considering a puppy for a whileand decided that a havanese would be a great addition to their family. They called Chewy's breeder and she has a puppy that became available and is ready to go home in 2 weeks. The pup is actually a "full brother" of Chewy's. I know that isn't the technical term, but that is how I see it. My sister and her family really want the puppy but didn't think one would become available so soon. They have plans to travel this summer (not the entire summer) but don't want to leave a new puppy with someone while they are gone...which I totally understand...so they are torn. I had an idea but not sure if it is a good one. Of course, my sister and I would discuss this with the breeder, but wanted your opinion...if the majority of you think it is a really bad idea then we will probably pass on the option all together.
I was thinking that John and I would pick up the puppy and "raise" him until the end of July...we will not be traveling during this time. Here are my concerns...you all might have many more I have not thought of...
1. Will the puppy have an issue going from the breeder to our house and then his new forever home in this period of time?
2. Will Chewy suffer mentally from having a "brother" and then having him leave?
3. Will Chewy be able to play with other pups while this dog is not fully vaccinated...I am assuming this isn't a good idea. We can probably get around this but Chewy will have to go outside to potty thus being exposed to where other dogs have been...we live in Manhattan so this is unavoidable.

What are your thoughts? Feel free to be completely honest.


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## Suzi (Oct 27, 2010)

Cherin36 said:


> My sister and her family met Chewy and fell in love. They have been considering a puppy for a whileand decided that a havanese would be a great addition to their family. They called Chewy's breeder and she has a puppy that became available and is ready to go home in 2 weeks. The pup is actually a "full brother" of Chewy's. I know that isn't the technical term, but that is how I see it. My sister and her family really want the puppy but didn't think one would become available so soon. They have plans to travel this summer (not the entire summer) but don't want to leave a new puppy with someone while they are gone...which I totally understand...so they are torn. I had an idea but not sure if it is a good one. Of course, my sister and I would discuss this with the breeder, but wanted your opinion...if the majority of you think it is a really bad idea then we will probably pass on the option all together.
> I was thinking that John and I would pick up the puppy and "raise" him until the end of July...we will not be traveling during this time. Here are my concerns...you all might have many more I have not thought of...
> 1. Will the puppy have an issue going from the breeder to our house and then his new forever home in this period of time?
> 2. Will Chewy suffer mentally from having a "brother" and then having him leave?
> ...


 Their are a lot of breeders who keep their pups tell they are six mo old and then go to their forever homes.
Does your sister live very far from you? 
Deep in my heart I think it would be hard to seperate them after that length of time. Your breeder will probably have another litter.  And it would be hard on you and your family.
I got Zoey three mo after Maddie the house training went a bit backwards tell it finally turned around just recently and that has been 3mo. 
I think I would wait tell fall.


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## Cherin36 (Sep 2, 2010)

So is it "ok" to ask the breeder to keep the puppy if they pay for him upfront and even pay extra for her to keep him until end of July? My sister asked me that but I didn't think that was an option.
My sister lives in Atlanta and we are in NYC so not close.
I am more concerned about Chewy's feelings than ours. I know I would become attached but the puppy is for my oldest niece who is like a daughter to me so nothing would make me happier than to help this work out for her. I know she would love the puppy as much as I love Chewy....I know I am saying this though not having done it yet! 
Thanks for your advice!!


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## TilliesMom (Sep 30, 2010)

I think either way would work. As long as the puppy is in a safe, warm, loving environment and either you or the breeder are raising him as your sister would (crate training, potty training, etc...) I think the puppy will adjust just fine. As for your dog, he might have a hard time transitioning to having a brother, then where did he go?? Depends on your dogs temperment... hopefully the experts will chime in soon!


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## LilyMyLove (Jul 11, 2009)

I would wait until the next litter. I have not heard of breeders keeping dogs for six months unless they are waiting to see if it will be a show prospect. 

Its good for the puppy to go to its forever home and bond with its people when its young in my opinion, like a baby does. It forms a secure attachment. You could move the dog around and it might not have attachment issues but thats a very slim chance. 

Also, if they go on a trip every summer, are they the right family for a Hav? They may want to think about it. I think someone has a quote on here that says "I didnt get a Havanese, I got a lifestyle" and thats so true. Lily comes with me on every trip-I made arrangements when she was coming home to not work for the first few weeks so I could be home with her. People who do leave their Havs when they travel leave them with a very trusted friend or dog sitter and for a short time. 

They can be very sensitive, attached little companion animals, you really have to factor them into your plans, and if you can't do it at the beginning, another breed or pet may be a better fit for your family. 

Best luck with whatever they decide!


Meghan


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## LilyMyLove (Jul 11, 2009)

Also, I should ask-how long will they be gone for, and how long would the dog be spending with you?


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## Cherin36 (Sep 2, 2010)

He would spend mid-April until end of July with us. My sister will be gone for a total of about 4 weeks this summer. Not 4 weeks consecutively but 4 weeks throughout that period of time. She doesn't think it is fair to the puppy to bring him home and then leave him with someone else every few weeks while they are on vacation. She wants the puppy to have consistency and plenty of time to bond with the family without uprooting him every couple of weeks.


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## pjewel (Apr 11, 2007)

If you keep the puppy for several months, do you realistically think you'll be able to part with it? I do think your Chewy would miss the puppy when it moved on, but then again, many people here foster dogs and their fur family have to get used to having another dog around, then having it go.

I think you and your sister have to take an objective look at the situation to determine whether you could make it work. For the puppy, there would be an additional adjustment, but all the rescued dogs go through a time with a foster family before moving on to their forever homes.

You, your sister and the breeder should all discuss it before making a decision IMHO.


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## Cherin36 (Sep 2, 2010)

oh, one more thing...totally agree about the vacation point, however these plans were made months ago. My sister was looking to get a puppy this fall....it is just circumstances I stated in my first post that has them now torn.
Thanks for your thoughts!


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## Cherin36 (Sep 2, 2010)

IMHO? Sorry, I am bad with the acronyms. I think that is a very valid question as to whether we could part with the puppy. Having never done this before, I obviously can not give a definitive answer. However, since I would be doing this for my sister and her family, I am pretty confident. The puppy would still be part of my family, he would be my nephew instead of my son.


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## LilyMyLove (Jul 11, 2009)

Geri,

I agree, but rescue dogs move from a foster to a permanent home out of necessity. It is so far from ideal. Find me a rescue without attachment issues! To do that willingly seems selfish. I know how bonded I was with Lily when she was 6 months and how she was with me-it would have been so hard on the both of us if she up and moved to my parents house (who we spent 1 week a month with, BTW). 

Alot of it depends on the dog's temperment, there are not many Havs that could deal with that transition well, IMHO. Aside from what is good for the dog, I would talk to your sister about it, I personally wouldn't necessarily want to sign up for likely separation anxiety and attachment issues with a dog that I didn't rescue.


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## LilyMyLove (Jul 11, 2009)

IMHO-IN My Humble Opinion.


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## Cherin36 (Sep 2, 2010)

You all have great points. Thank you so much for your candid opinions. Much appreciated!


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## LilyMyLove (Jul 11, 2009)

Good luck with whatever you decide!


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## HavaneseSoon (Nov 4, 2008)

I say wait for another puppy! If you keep the puppy for several months, it will be very hard to give up the puppy. A new puppy is a lot of work! Lots of training! Those first few months are also very special with all the the fun times with a puppy.


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## pjewel (Apr 11, 2007)

I suspect you don't realize how in love you would be with this new addition once you and your whole family bonded with him. In the end, I wouldn't be surprised if it wound up being yours, with your sister getting hers as originally intended, in the fall.


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## West End Girl (Feb 18, 2011)

I might be tired and might have missed something reading, but may I ask why your sister can't take the puppy NOW & then leave him with you for the 4 weeks while she's on vacation? July is 3 months away.


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## Cherin36 (Sep 2, 2010)

Good question. She will not be gone 4 weeks consecutively...a total of 4 weeks over the 4 1/2 months. I live in NYC and she is in Atlanta so for me to fly home to get the puppy each time takes a lot of time. Our other sister does not live nearby either.
Geri, you are probably right! We don't have any human children. If we did, I wouldn't consider it. Maybe I shouldn't even be considering it since we have Chewy. Again our main concern is Chewy and the puppy. I know John and I would miss the little guy and be sad for awhile once he is gone but I would do anything (legal) for my nieces.


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## Laurief (Nov 7, 2006)

My big concern is if a dog is even "right" for them. Do they vacation like this every year! That's a lot of time to leave a dog in general - wherever it goes. 
I also think that as much as you will fall in love, you could probably part with the pup - but my concern would be that Chewy would have a problem once the pup is gone as they will have become a "pack" by then.


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## KSC (Aug 6, 2009)

I would also say wait till the next litter....the family would miss out on all the fun early days of a puppy doing it this way. You would know the dog and be attached and they would not be. 

We got Kipling after we returned from a trip to Europe and it was so exciting to have him those first weeks (hard too of course) but exciting and very bonding. I think the idea, while a nice thought, would end up taking away some of that for the family.


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## krandall (Jun 11, 2009)

I'd say wait for another puppy too. I purposely waited till the beginning of the summer so I would have a full 10 weeks to devote to the beginning stages of puppy training, and I'm so glad I did. As fast as kids grow, puppies grow much faster!

As far as vacations (or other travel) is concerned, I do think that IF YOU MAKE AN EFFORT to find the right situation, a young dog can easily adjust to staying with other people while you are away. While we take Kodi with us on vacation, I often travel out side the country on business, and it wouldn't be fair for Kodi to be locked in his ex-pen all day while my DH was at work day after day. I would never put him in a kennel, but I have two in-home boarding situations where he LOVES to go. He has other dogs to play with in both places, and adores the caregivers. (one is a good friend who is a dog trainer, the other is his groomer, also a dog trainer) While he's always thrilled to see me when I get back, he is also thrilled to be THERE when I drop him off. So I feel perfectly comfortable leaving him either place.

IMO, if you ARE going to do a fair bit of traveling without your Hav, you need to spend some time up-front, making good arrangements.


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## KSC (Aug 6, 2009)

Good points Karen - I agree on all of that with the travel arrangements. Kipling too goes to an in home situation with other dogs and he loves it. I do not believe that getting a Hav means committing to travelling only with your Hav.


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## Laurief (Nov 7, 2006)

Oh believe me, I did not mean to not get a dog if you ever got away, my concern would be if every year you are someone that travels for several months (off an on) a year, it might be a bit hard on the pup! 
my guys go with us on our big vacation this year - 2 weeks at the beach. But when we go away for 2- 3 nights, they do have a petsitter in the house.


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## KSC (Aug 6, 2009)

Yes Laurie - I definitely understood your concern....the topic of travel and being able to have a dog is one that sparks discussion every time. My observation on it, is that there is a sliding scale where some think nothing of it and the other extreme which is if you get a dog you should travel with your dog. I tend to fall in the middle. I believe that dogs, like children, can happily adjust to mommy and daddy being away as long as care is taken to find the right accommodations. That was just the point I was trying to make.


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## Cherin36 (Sep 2, 2010)

Thanks again for everyone's input. There are a set of circumstances that came into play where one of Chewy's brothers became available...they originally were going to wait until fall-winter. And althougth they want the puppy the vacations were already planned months ago. So pretty much a case of unfortunate timing. I was just trying to think of a possible solution for them. Once they have this puppy or any puppy they would take him/her into consideration when making vacation plans...they just didn't know months ago that this might happen. With that said, John and I travel from time to time and have 4 different great people Chewy can stay with....he has stayed with our breeder, his best friend and her mom and our dog walker. He loves it. It is like his very own vacation and he always acclimates beautifully and then is excited to come home. We have not had any problems. We also take him with us whenever we can. He is great on airplanes. It is my experience that if you have people you trust it works out fine. Our only issue has been that they don't want to give him back!  With that said, my sister does not want to leave a young puppy with someone else while they are gone...which I totally agree with.


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## krandall (Jun 11, 2009)

Laurief said:


> Oh believe me, I did not mean to not get a dog if you ever got away, my concern would be if every year you are someone that travels for several months (off an on) a year, it might be a bit hard on the pup!
> my guys go with us on our big vacation this year - 2 weeks at the beach. But when we go away for 2- 3 nights, they do have a petsitter in the house.


I do go away for up to 3 weeks at least once a year, sometimes twice, and several times a year when I am gone for 3-5 days. I figure if I could do it to my kids, I can do it to my dog.<g> Both the kids and the dog have adjusted nicely. As I said, if my only option were a kennel, though, I wouldn't get a dog at all.


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## krandall (Jun 11, 2009)

KSC said:


> Yes Laurie - I definitely understood your concern....the topic of travel and being able to have a dog is one that sparks discussion every time. My observation on it, is that there is a sliding scale where some think nothing of it and the other extreme which is if you get a dog you should travel with your dog. I tend to fall in the middle. I believe that dogs, like children, can happily adjust to mommy and daddy being away as long as care is taken to find the right accommodations. That was just the point I was trying to make.


Oops. Should have read your post first. Sounds like we're on the same page. Funny thing about that!


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## KSC (Aug 6, 2009)

LOL Karen


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## Suzi (Oct 27, 2010)

Cherin36 said:


> He would spend mid-April until end of July with us. My sister will be gone for a total of about 4 weeks this summer. Not 4 weeks consecutively but 4 weeks throughout that period of time. She doesn't think it is fair to the puppy to bring him home and then leave him with someone else every few weeks while they are on vacation. She wants the puppy to have consistency and plenty of time to bond with the family without uprooting him every couple of weeks.


 Why not just puppy sit when your sister is actually gone? That way she has at least 6 weeks or whatever with her forever home. It does not sound like she will be gone for more than 2 to three weeks at a time? Have you asked the breeder when her next litter will be?


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## Cherin36 (Sep 2, 2010)

Hi Everyone. I want to thank you all again for your input. My sister let the breeder know that she is not able to take the puppy. Hopefully they will be able to get a puppy this fall/winter from the next litter.


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## ls-indy (Apr 10, 2008)

I think waiting is a wise decision. That was their original plan - and they shouldn't allow themselves to get "swept away" with the idea of a new puppy. I couldn't enjoy vacation if I was worrying about a new family member. 

Sounds like your sister vacations several times/year. She might want to discuss this with potential breeders (hopefully ones that live close by) and see if they will board her havie when she plans to be away. I am able to do this with Daisy and Beau. They are always so EXCITED when we pull into Kim's driveway and they realize where they are! They enjoy their time at their original home and are treated extra-special when they visit. It gives us great peace of mind knowing they are enjoying their vacation while we enjoy ours...


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## Kathie (Jul 31, 2008)

Sounds like the best solution. I've been gone babysitting grandchildren for a few days and missed this exchange. We got Abby at eight months with her spending all that time with her breeder. Her transition here was very difficult and was filled with "issues". I think if you can get a puppy at an early age it is so much easier to bond.

Please let us see the puppy when it arrives! Hopefully, your sister will join the forum, too!


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## KSC (Aug 6, 2009)

Likely a tough decision for the family - so tempting when a puppy is available - but good for you all on making this decision. Sounds like the best solution.


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