# Male or Female Hav????



## hartman studio (Feb 14, 2008)

Do you all feel that males are more laidback and affectionate than females? I know this has been discussed before,but in doing a search I couldn't find the posts. I do remember the phrase "females love you, but males are in love with you" So for those of you with both, do you feel this is true? My Mom is planning on getting a Havanese. She has only had female dogs in the past and would not even consider a male, but a couple people she has spoken in the last 2 days think she would be happier with the personality of a male dog. She wants a sweet, laidback, calm dog.She does not want a dog marking in the house. Do your neutered males mark their territory? Since I only have a female I can't really compare. I tend to think it depends on the individual dog, but lots of breeders do say the males are sweeter, so I'm thinking I must be wrong. Cocotini is sweet and affectionate, but she is demanding about getting attention 24/7. She also has an alpha personality- Mindy puts up with alot from her!!! So, please give me your opinions as my Mom would like to make a decision very soon as to which would be better for her. Thanks for any opinions!!!!


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## Narwyn (Jan 24, 2010)

Although I think individual personality over rides all else, I always tell people males are better pets. Don't get me wrong - I have had some really awesome females - but males are just more into you, more attentive, just easier. I mean, they call them bitches for a reason ;-)

Dogs mark if they are not taught that that is unacceptable. My male will pee on every vertical surface possible outside, but knows that he's not allowed to inside. It is a little harder to train intact males, but totally doable. I had a Mini Poodle female who marked in the house constantly if left to her own devices. It all comes down to house breaking and knowing their limits.

I would try to open her up the possibility of a male, but ultimately, let the personality be the determining factor. 

~K


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## mintchip (Apr 19, 2007)

I thought the same as your Mom! 
I went with the personality! I have 2 wonderful males!:grouphug:
PS-Oliver and Comet don't mark but I know some girl dogs that do


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## juliav (Nov 21, 2006)

"Females love you, but males are inlove with you". I think it's a wide held belief among breeders of many, many different breeds, not just havanese. I've heard the same from maltese, yorkie, poodle and shepherd breeders. I think that this famous saying got started by the fact that most breeders (of different breeds) have more males born than females. A breeder only needs one or two really exceptional males, but can definitely have more females. 

When my friend was looking for a maltese from a reputable breeder, the breeder pretty much told her that she is very likely to put a show quality male into a pet home, but will sit on a female even if she is questionable, just to make sure. 

While I love and prefer males, my Havanese is not a lap dog and is very, very independent. Don't get me wrong, he always sleeps with one eye open and follows me around from room to room, and will sit at the door and whine if I am gone. But, he prefers to sit byhimself. He is my "next to me" not "on top of me" dog.


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## HavaneseSoon (Nov 4, 2008)

Buy from a good breeder who knows the personalities of the dogs! 

I love my boys! I chose boys "because boys fall in love with you." I haven't had any marking issues. Dexter is neutered. He will mark occasionally if we go for a walk down the street. Most of the time, I will not allow marking when we are out walking. He voids 99% of the time in squat position. 

Some owners will choose males over females due to the anatomy of the dog. With the Hav having shaggy hair and with the boys being neutered, I have not had to deal with the problem that some breeders have a problem with....Males are sweet and playful and love to sit next to you.....

I guess it is all in how you raise your Havs growing up. This is my 2 cents worth....


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## good buddy (Feb 20, 2007)

juliav said:


> "Females love you, but males are inlove with you". I think it's a wide held belief among breeders of many, many different breeds, not just havanese. I've heard the same from maltese, yorkie, poodle and shepherd breeders.


You can add Chinese Cresteds to that list too. When my boys come to me they have an adoring look in their eyes, but when Phoebe comes to me it's all about her. We should have named her "MeMe"!



HavaneseSoon said:


> I haven't had any marking issues. Dexter is neutered. He will mark occasionally if we go for a walk down the street. Most of the time, I will not allow marking when we are out walking. He voids 99% of the time in squat position.


Linda, it's the same with my boys, no problems in the house and Rufus may wish to mark on walks. Marley never even desires to mark when we walk, but I have a female Crestie that will mark every tree and corner if she gets the chance!


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## Leslie (Feb 28, 2007)

In most of the animal kingdom the main job of a male is to pass on his genes. So, to accomplish that he needs to be appealing/interesting enough to a female to have her allow him to breed with her. The best way to win her over is to be sweet, adoring, loving, kind, etc., etc. With that as his "job", IMO, the males will most often have the nicer temperament/personalities.


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## ls-indy (Apr 10, 2008)

We have a male and a female. We got Daisy first and added Beau a year later. Daisy is the alpha of the two. Beau will get in my lap or lie right next to me with his head on my lap. He is protective: more aware of what's going on around the house and quick to "alert" us. If Daisy is on my lap, or next to me, she will growl at Beau if he tries to come too close. Beau will give way to her. They both love to give kisses and are very affectionate with DH as well as me. Luckily, there are two of them and two of us - so there's always a lap available! Both my havies pee standing on 3 legs. On walks, Daisy marks more than Beau, but he will pee on top of her spot every chance he gets! Neither mark or pee in the house. Best pets ever!! I'd go by personality....


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## hartman studio (Feb 14, 2008)

thank you everyone for your input - please keep your opinions coming!!!!


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## krandall (Jun 11, 2009)

I only have a sample size of one, but I wouldn't trade my boy for anything! I started out with no preconceived ideas on the gender... I wanted a friendly, trainable, self-confident dog, and knew that whether it was a girl or a boy, it would be neutered.

Kodi never, ever marks in the house. On walks I have taken the advice to keep him away from vertical surfaces, so he has never learned to lift his leg outside either. He stands like a horse to pee. Also, I've heard that some girls mark too, so that doesn't seem to be a valid reason for picking one sex over the other.

I agree with the others who have said to find a good breeder, tell them what you want personality-wise, and have them help you pick. One bonus to getting a boy is that a lot of people DO have preconceived ideas about gender, and often THINK a female dog would be a better choice. As a result, you can sometimes get a quality boy faster than a girl. That's what happened when I was looking for a puppy. I contacted the Kings, and we discussed what I was looking for. They asked if I was specifically looking for a girl or a boy. When I said I didn't really care, they told me that they had just had a litter of FIVE boys, and while they had a waiting list for girls, three of these puppies were available just because they were the "wrong" sex. Ah well, the loss of those other puppy buyers was my gain, as *I* got the BEST one!


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## sprorchid (Mar 30, 2010)

I hafta say, having 2 boys and 2 girls (not all havs)... it is personality (non-alpha), and also how you raise them.

For the most part I've had a boy dog and a girl dog. I tend to favor that, it's a natural balance. the 2 boys I've had, currently a 6 month old 1/2 hav 1/2 shih tzu pup, they both seriously bonded to me. neither dog was an 'on top of me' dog, but both are 'next to me' dogs. My females were very affectionate as well, and sweet, it's just different. plus 2 of mine were rescues.

anyway, if your mom likes girls, let her have a girl. I have a co-worker who only gets girl dogs. 

I will say, being a gal myself, I think boy dogs are more protective of a female owner, esp around a human male. IMO. I know both my boys preferred women. My other male, he's passed away now, if he met a couple, he'd always greet the woman first. always.


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## KSC (Aug 6, 2009)

I've never had a female - Kipling is our first dog - he's male, neutered, doesn't mark in the house and he gets more lovey dovey with us every day.


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## CapotesMom (Apr 3, 2007)

DON'T BE FOOLED!!! ound:

Yes males are IN love with you.. but what I've found is that if a male havanese were a male human they'd be one of those creepy stalker types that follow you around every day and have a wall of candid pictures of you on the ceiling above their bed.. This is how Capote is.. he's a neurotic hyper attention seeking..jealous mess! lol. I wouldn't trade him for anything.. he's my lil red headed stepchild.. but MAN!!! When I got Taylor I discovered what 'sweet' is.. and what a good dog she is. Capote gets overly excited if you try to pet him.. Taylor just nuzzles into the lovin' and lets you cuddle her. 

I made a memo when I got her.. if ever I get other dogs they'll always be females.. she's so much calmer and sweeter and sincere in her affections.. unlike capote.. my lil man whore.


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## krandall (Jun 11, 2009)

CapotesMom said:


> DON'T BE FOOLED!!! ound:
> 
> Yes males are IN love with you.. but what I've found is that if a male havanese were a male human they'd be one of those creepy stalker types that follow you around every day and have a wall of candid pictures of you on the ceiling above their bed.. This is how Capote is.. he's a neurotic hyper attention seeking..jealous mess! lol. I wouldn't trade him for anything.. he's my lil red headed stepchild.. but MAN!!! When I got Taylor I discovered what 'sweet' is.. and what a good dog she is. Capote gets overly excited if you try to pet him.. Taylor just nuzzles into the lovin' and lets you cuddle her.
> 
> I made a memo when I got her.. if ever I get other dogs they'll always be females.. she's so much calmer and sweeter and sincere in her affections.. unlike capote.. my lil man whore.


I think what's going on with Capote is just Capote... not "boy dog". Kodi is very affectionate, but also perfectly comfortable being left in his pen with a chewy when we go out. He loves to nap on the couch with me, but sleeps happily in his own bed in his crate at night. He has spent several week-long periods with one friend and a weekend with another, and both have said how incredibly well adjusted he is. He is certainly thrilled to see me when I get back, but settles right into their pack and is happy as a clam while I'm gone. When we come into the house he does a few spins and then goes belly up for some rubbing, but he doesn't jump on us, he doesn't bark, and he CERTAINLY doesn't get "overexcited".

while I'm sure there are plenty of wonderful sweet girls out there, I'm sure there are neurotic girls too. And I can't imagine a dog of either sex sweeter and more affectionate than Kodi. I still say pick for individual temperament, don't count on one sex being "better" than the other.


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## CapotesMom (Apr 3, 2007)

krandall said:


> I think what's going on with Capote is just Capote... not "boy dog". Kodi is very affectionate, but also perfectly comfortable being left in his pen with a chewy when we go out. He loves to nap on the couch with me, but sleeps happily in his own bed in his crate at night. He has spent several week-long periods with one friend and a weekend with another, and both have said how incredibly well adjusted he is. He is certainly thrilled to see me when I get back, but settles right into their pack and is happy as a clam while I'm gone. When we come into the house he does a few spins and then goes belly up for some rubbing, but he doesn't jump on us, he doesn't bark, and he CERTAINLY doesn't get "overexcited".
> 
> while I'm sure there are plenty of wonderful sweet girls out there, I'm sure there are neurotic girls too. And I can't imagine a dog of either sex sweeter and more affectionate than Kodi. I still say pick for individual temperament, don't count on one sex being "better" than the other.


Capote doesn't do any of that either. He sleeps in a crate at night happily and doesn't make a peep til I let him out in the morning. Most of the day he stays in the kitchen (though sometimes he still gets mad if I go out and leaves me a lil 'present' to pick up when I get home) He doesn't bark at me or Shaun, but he will bark at any stray wind that floats by outside.. that's the 'protective' thing that boys have. Taylor barks when there's a reason to bark.

Staying at others houses he usually automatically attaches to the girl in the house and velcros to her but doesn't want anything to do with the guy in the house. My best friend watches him sometimes and while Taylor loves to play with her dog, Capote would rather be right under foot or under her hand getting petted. ...Like I said..he's an attention whore. If you give Taylor attention he gets jealous and butts in front of her to get petted instead of her. If you pick taylor up he jumps against you to be picked up.. but if you pick him he wriggles around so much because he's so excited that you can't pet him. None of it will ever be trained out of him.. even with training he knows the commands but the eagerness..the hyperactive 'ready to go' is right beneath the surface. "stay" means he sits still..well..everything but his lil butt which wags away something fierce until you let him out of the spot. He's never marked..he was neutered early (which everyone says calms them down.. wrong) ...it's just how he is.. If they made ritalin for dogs he'd be on it.


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## Pixiesmom (Jul 31, 2008)

Pixie is a very loving little sweetheart. She is a bit possesive though, especially of my husband. I do remember her being more demanding as a puppy than Mig has been. She's a velcro dog for sure. At 16 weeks, not sure about Mig yet, but he is a Mr. Cuddlebuns so far. I can't report about marking in him-hopefully that won't develop. I'm sure either way if the temperment is sweet to begin with, whatever sex is chosen will be a perfect fit. It's hard to go wrong with these guys.


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## hartman studio (Feb 14, 2008)

Mindy, you crack me up when you describe Capote's behavior!! In some ways, though, he reminds me of Cocotini-always demanding attention and very upset when my Mindy gets attention instead of her!!

I think what it all boils down to is that each dog has their own personality and we cannot generalize that males will make better pets than females!! What I did find interesting is that all of you that responded with male(neutered) dogs did not have a marking issue. I think that was my Mom's main concern with a male dog.

Thank you to everyone that responded- I will pass all this on to my Mom!!


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## krandall (Jun 11, 2009)

CapotesMom said:


> Capote doesn't do any of that either. He sleeps in a crate at night happily and doesn't make a peep til I let him out in the morning. Most of the day he stays in the kitchen (though sometimes he still gets mad if I go out and leaves me a lil 'present' to pick up when I get home) He doesn't bark at me or Shaun, but he will bark at any stray wind that floats by outside.. that's the 'protective' thing that boys have. Taylor barks when there's a reason to bark.
> 
> Staying at others houses he usually automatically attaches to the girl in the house and velcros to her but doesn't want anything to do with the guy in the house. My best friend watches him sometimes and while Taylor loves to play with her dog, Capote would rather be right under foot or under her hand getting petted. ...Like I said..he's an attention whore. If you give Taylor attention he gets jealous and butts in front of her to get petted instead of her. If you pick taylor up he jumps against you to be picked up.. but if you pick him he wriggles around so much because he's so excited that you can't pet him. None of it will ever be trained out of him.. even with training he knows the commands but the eagerness..the hyperactive 'ready to go' is right beneath the surface. "stay" means he sits still..well..everything but his lil butt which wags away something fierce until you let him out of the spot. He's never marked..he was neutered early (which everyone says calms them down.. wrong) ...it's just how he is.. If they made ritalin for dogs he'd be on it.


Sounds like he should have been an agility Hav.<g> But I still say it's him, not because he's a boy.


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## Mom2Izzo (Jul 1, 2009)

I was dead set on getting a female but then when I explained the temperament and personality I wanted the breeder sent me a picture of a male she thought would be perfect for us. Can I say how WONDERFUL he is! Very even tempered and lovable. He LOVES to be held and snuggled!!!! I would get another boy in a heartbeat! That being said, I have a Golden Retriever who is a female and she has the same temperament as my male Hav. I think it just depends.


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## CapotesMom (Apr 3, 2007)

krandall said:


> Sounds like he should have been an agility Hav.<g> But I still say it's him, not because he's a boy.


Don't think I haven't thought about it! He would love it.. I'd question my sanity though..


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## pjewel (Apr 11, 2007)

In my experience the boys are easier and more laid back and loving. I've had other breeds and have loved having my girls but when I got Ruby I got a taste of what the other people here have so often said. She's very smart, easily bored, way more destructive, much less a hold me and love of me type. Given what I know now, my choice would be another male, hands down.


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## Missy (Nov 6, 2006)

I've only had boys, and both mine are pretty laid back and independent but I think that is just luck of the draw. Neither of my boys mark in OUR house, They have marked in vacation rentals that have had other dogs in them and in pet stores...but it has been a long time since they have even done that. It is just training them not to. I think it really does come down to the dogs personality. But I will say this...I truly believe boys are easier to house train, I think their bladders are just bigger, and getting through neutering is easier than a spay,


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