# Humor of the day



## Cheryl (Mar 17, 2007)

This is not to offend the cat lovers.....

DOG DIARY


8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 PM - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 PM - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 PM - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!



CAT DIARY

Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength The only thing that keeps me going is my
Dream of escape. 
In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. 
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I over heard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.

The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released -and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.


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## Leslie (Feb 28, 2007)

We once owned a cat who could have written this! Very funny, Cheryl ound: Thanks for posting it!


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## Lina (Apr 26, 2007)

Cheryl, thanks for laugh. ound:


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## Jane (Jun 2, 2007)

ound:

Cats are evil, I always knew it. :biggrin1:


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## irnfit (Nov 21, 2006)

I love that and I can relate, having 3 cats now and many, many cats throughout my life. They all seem to have a little bit of that in them. My little Missy, a Maine **** female, has now found a hiding spot in the ceiling in the basement. She is very weird, but after several run-ins with Kodi and Shelby, she is now hiding.


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## Jacklyn Weeks (Dec 23, 2007)

Cheryl said:


> I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
> 
> The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released -and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.


ound: ound: Definitely had a cat similar to that once!


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## KristinFusco (Jun 5, 2007)

Cheryl this is hilarious!

Having lived with both cats and dogs growing up, it was definitely the case with my family's pets. Thanks for the laugh, I am sending this to my mom and grandmom.


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## Jane (Jun 2, 2007)

Kristin! Welcome back! We've missed you! :hug:


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## Poornima (Jun 29, 2007)

Cheryl, thanks for sharing. A friend had sent it when we got Benji and everytime I read it, it makes me chuckle.


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## Me&2Girls (May 11, 2007)

I love this. Having both cats and dogs I swear this is so true.


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## casperkeep (May 16, 2007)

That was too funny and soo true. I loved my cat named Casper..had to give her to my sis-in-laws becauzse I was allergic to her and could not take it anymore. She was all white with one blue eye and one green eye. I still go and see her. She was soo sweet and my first indoor cat ever.


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## irnfit (Nov 21, 2006)

The best is when Jack, my male Maine **** wants to sit on the back of my chair. He will jump from the dining room chair, to the back of my Mom's chair and then to my chair. Then Kodi will jump in my lap and there is a starring contest between him and the cat, and all the while Kodi is mumbling at him. Jack just sits there as if he doesn't even see Kodi.


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## mellowbo (Aug 12, 2007)

That is so true, thanks for the laugh. 
Carole


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